![]() | What
Men Want from Romance When it comes to romance, guys get a bad rap. The conventional wisdom is that they are an unromantic bunch, who'd rather chug a beer in front of the TV than sip champagne by candlelight. But men can be just as romantic as women, though they often express it in different ways. |
The quickest path to a man's heart is through his
ego. "The other day, my lady told me she thought I was sexy. That was so
cool! I'd never heard that before and it blew me away!" says a
schoolteacher from Chicago. A political consultant from Washington, D.C.
agrees: "The most romantic thing in the world is for you to be in awe of
your man's skills -- whether it's his ability to make people laugh, perform at sports,
fix things, or retrieve and display esoteric knowledge. Let him wow you,"
he says. "Milk chocolate is for kids. Dark chocolate is
for lovers," says Weinstein, who explains that dark chocolate has a higher
percentage of cocoa, which means it has more phenylethylamine, a chemical that
mimics the feeling you have when you're in love. Is his
college sweatshirt so faded you can't decipher the name of his alma mater? Is
he mourning the loss of a rare comic book that his mother threw away when he
left home? Does he collect antique hood ornaments? Webb says that a gift that
requires some effort is sure to be a big hit with your guy. "Men and women
tend to express love differently. Women are usually the more nurturing types
and tend to think of romance in terms of 'soft touches' while men express love
in more practical ways," says Webb. "A lot of people say that shared values or
goals are what make a relationship work," says Weinstein. "But to me
it's a shared sense of humor. If you like the Marx Brothers and your date
doesn't, then it's simply not going to work," he says. "When you can
find someone to laugh with, then you know you're really connecting." A picture really does paint a thousand words --
especially if it's of the two of you tanned and glowing at a beachside resort.
"I went to my girlfriend's office and saw that she had a picture of us on
vacation in Cancun," says a Seattle construction worker. "Little
things like that just make you feel great." A publisher
in New York says that he isn't a huge romantic, but he admits that the rotating
dance floor at the Rainbow Room makes him pretty gooey. "You're surrounded
by well-dressed couples of all ages who know how to dance. This gives the
effect of being in a romantic movie about old New York. Plus, it's a little
disorienting with all that spinning around, which puts you in a dreamlike
state," he says. Because in general guys just like big stuff. But
also because taking in such a huge view can put life into perspective.
"The tremendous view of the city with all its lights is not only awesome
in its own right, but accentuates the essential smallness of the individual
person," says a Chicago attorney. "Thus humbled, it is most
comforting to realize, at that instant, you're not alone in the world." |